The past couple days, almost a week now, I've not felt like doing ANYTHING. I made dinner last night, and then took a nap, and watched TV until bed. Well, Josh and I finished off Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets before we went to bed, but I could've gotten a lot of much-needed things accomplished. Laundry, dishes, groceries; heavens.. even some pampering like re-doing my fingernails or something. I feel stuck in a rut. I'm in a funk. I need to try to be more positive about my job, and learn to roll with the punches, and just... do the best that I can do, and not only do the best that I can, but make the best out of any situation. I have a few awful days under my belt that I can say "at least it's not as bad as such and such a night". But also, I need to keep my mind focused on what I'm doing here. I need a year's experience (AT LEAST) before I can get a job doing something else. It would be nice to have 2 years I'm sure, but our time line does not allow for that. I need to realize that this is just a step in the process. Focus on ACLS and other things like that. Josh will find out about his internship in March-ish, sounds like. Well, he'll find out if he gets an interview in February. I hope they interview him, and I hope he does an outstanding job. We were looking at apartments in Pittsburgh last night, and I've been looking at the job boards pretty regularly. I hope and pray that God opens doors for us in Pittsburgh, or if that is not his will, he would make us aware of his plans for us. Especially now with my grandfather rapidly declining, I wish I was home with family. I know I'd still have to work but the days I had off I could at least spend with them. Pittsburgh is about 2 and a half hours away from clearfield, about one hour or so away from Indiana. It's about the same distance away as Scranton, just in the other direction. There are so many things on my mind causing me anxiety, I just need to give them all up to the Lord, and Pray pray pray. Perhaps in this time of sorrow fasting would be a good idea. I really hope Josh and I can go to care group on Monday. I think going snowboarding on Saturday would do us some good too - get our minds off things. I can't wait for my stress management class at work. Perhaps it will give me some new ideas of how to get myself under control before the crash comes, and without spending loads of money on yoga classes or something. I would like to try yoga though - I think it would be relaxing and peaceful. Coffee does the soul good, too.. i'm convinced. Off to conquer the worlds more important problems, like dishes.
Love, Sara
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