Mind over matter

I just finished a little work-a-thon with three days working, one day off, and another three days working. Realistically - looking back, I was tired, but it wasn't impossible or unmanageable. I made it seem like it though. I whined and complained and talked about how tired I waaassss... I look at others who have children at home to care for and work 6 day stretches solid all the time, and still have time for family and a social life. I know of one woman in particular who works 2 jobs and has 3 children at home. I look at them in envy, because I would love to pick up extra hours to make a nice pay-check, and I would love to have more time to dedicate to keeping our apartment clean or making sure the laundry's done. I feel lazy and inadequate. Some of it is energy level...I do believe that it's possible to over-load yourself and burn out, but I'm guessing that most of it is my state-of-mind. I dread going to work, and I think "Oh, I've worked 3 days, so I'm tired". If only my thinking were different.. would that still be the case? I look at this woman I was talking about - and she's just SO optimistic and upbeat. Even if she's handed the worst assignment on the board, she's ready for it, smiling all the way. I have that "dread" feeling as soon as I walk in the doors and see that there are 20 patients on the unit. It's a state-of-mind that's keeping me from glorifying God. I'm sure with my moaning and complaining and making drama out of every single situation at work I'm not glorifying God. I'm not setting a very good example for Christians with how I'm behaving. I need to change it, I need to fix it! This isn't good! It's that feeling that I'm privileged to days off and to rest and relaxation, I'm privileged to a decent assignment at work, I'm privileged to spend a day vegging out and being unproductive when there's laundry and dishes and dog hair everywhere. I'm privileged to sleep in till 9:30 every morning and when I don't get to I'm privileged to be a grouch. Realistically, I'm blessed to be breathing. Blessed that I can do that laundry or the dishes, or go to work and provide for my family. I'm blessed with work in this struggling economy. That's needs to be my state-of-mind at ALL times. Dearest friends, I'll keep praying. But please pray for me as well. Thank you, Lord!

Love, Sara