It's been a while, dear friend.

Last I posted, Josh's interview had been rescheduled. He had the interview with one of the attorney's there, and it went well. We're still waiting for the final word whether he has the internship or not, but we're still hopeful that it went well and we'll have a solid answer by the end of the month.

So, what have my struggles been recently? I'm glad you ask, because I'm dying to talk about them. I'm a whiner and complainer, and it's really been apparent to me lately that I need to focus on the good things in life. I'm exhausted from work, and my heart has been acting up a little more lately than usual. I got my blood work done and it was all fine. My appointment with my doctor is not until May 31st, which in reality - I'm not even sure we'll be here for that. I'm stressed that we don't have a for sure yes about this internship, and I'm nervous about starting over with nursing in a different hospital - in a different state, with different co-workers. I know that we have something really rare on our unit - that almost all of us get along well and help each other out. I know that's not common, and I'm just hoping and praying that wherever I go to next has the same mentality as D200. I'm nervous about moving into the city. I'm nervous about finances (so what else is new!!).

All of these things I'm nervous about or hesitant about are under control, God's control. And I can trust in that. Sure, I have no idea what the road ahead holds for us. I have no idea if we will be staying here, or if we will be moving. If we will find an apartment or if we will be commuting from Indiana for a while, if I will find a job right away, or if I will have to find a temporary employment for a time. Everything is up in the air, except that I love God. I love my husband. I know that we can depend on each other, and we have supportive friends and family who are willing to help us.

I feel like I should be making more progress than I am... I wrote about being unsure and nervous and anxious last week, and the week before and the week before - so that should all be behind me and I should be fine now, trusting in God. This may take me a very long time to get the hang of, but the good thing is? I'm still working on it. I'm still fighting against my sinful nature. And I'll never quit fighting - and that, is way more pleasing to God than whether I'm anxious about things or not.

Love, Sara